Against all odds . . . we’re back. We shall not bore you, Humble Reader and Friend of Goblins, with the trials and tribulations that the workers at the Goblin Defense Fund have suffered these past three months. Enemy agents, Dwarvish and Elven in nature, conspired against us in numerous ways, and when it became clear that we would not surrender, resorted to Biological Warfare of the nastiest sort. We are happy to say that their efforts have failed: several magical cures and Greater Restoration spells later, we are back to full strength, and ready to carry on the fight. Let us begin by thanking you for your brave support; at the time of this writing, over 300 loyal Friends of Goblins have stepped up to the plate and signed the petition. We’ve also collected, as expected, grotesque amounts of money in donations, and we’ll be using that money shortly to launch our advertising banner campaign, as well as commence making bribes of questionable legality aimed at Heinsoo, Wyatt, and Mearls....